pessimism.. NICE GUYS, real nice.

all i have to say right now is that i am really fed up with seeing people’s reaction to this election…

honestly– this was the FIRST time i ever voted, and i just hate how it has effected me. after voting i felt so American. sounds stupid, but i did. AND WHY SHOULDN’T I???

i am rather disgusted at how people are so quick to give in.. so quick to say “the devil is workin! Lord help us!!”  is this how Jesus would REALLY want us to be acting guys??? NO.

i had a terrible day yesterday. i couldn’t even get over the fact that so many ‘Christians’ were harrassing Obama in their status’.  Well i have news for them, you should feel pretty darn LUCKY and BLESSED you live in America, because it this were another country, you could be killed for voicing your opionion as such.

as for the whole matter that the world is ending and that the ‘anti-christ’ has taken over… GET OVER IT. i am so offended to say that i am a Christian because of some people on this matter.  no matter who you voted for, you are an AMERICAN. You are blessed! you are free! you have a right to vote! if you didn’t, that’s your fault!…

as i voted i thought about those in all the other places in the world who CAN’T vote, and who can’t even do anything they really WANT to do.. how awful?? and here we are, spoiled as HECK, and complain BEYOND MY COMPREHENSION over who our president is.

well guess what, we are still AMERICANS! we are still free. You can still voice your opinion (even if it’s very UN-Christian)… Have more faith in America people.

or rather, have more faith in OUR FATHER IN HEAVEN! Romans 8:31 declares:  ‘If God is for us, who can be against us??”

 

NOBODY! wow. that should be enough, but it isn’t. and that breaks my heart.

whoever you voted for, whoever i voted for, they are people.. they deserve respect.. and so do all the OTHER people in the world who are just trying to Praise GOD. OK?

so that was my RANT, if you will. i’m not posting an awful opinion filled with disrespect on my Facebook..

good day.

“what the fat are you thinking?!” –David Crowder

so i really need to get BACK into the swing of things. the swing of school. the swing of doing my laundry. the swing of WANTING to go to class.  i MUST do these things. butttttt, i don’t wanna. flat out, i DO NOT want to.

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1767910

enjoy. it’s really lame most likely.. but i get a kick out of it.

also– i think i may need to go somewhere else… eek. scary scary scary scary!

also also– i am WAY blessed beyond belief. and i am really working on eliminating some of the NOISE in my life.    anddddd, i am voting on Tuesday. as should you!

i forgot a title.

i’m at beaner’s. studying my life away. then i am getting my hair cut tonight. AH. it has needed a good trim for a while now.. i think i will just be mad once i finally get it done…

a few thoughts:

pumpkin show is officially starting tomorrow!!! SO wish i could’ve gone, but it’s ok!

i really like my scarf i made.

it’s nice when people tell you good things about your boyfriend and people you know.

i need a job. like FOR REAL guys.

so, i must go. i am supposed to be studying for my philosophy exam… gross… 

this picture makes me laugh, out loud. hope you enjoy it as much as i do.

well. i wish i had more to say, but nobody really sees this anyways, so it’s ok.

uh, i’m real mad guys.

so in my science class we are supposed to look at our footprint on this earth, take some quiz online, and then it will show us the amount of earth’s it would take to sustain us if we all lived the way i live (or you, or whoever is doing the quiz)…

anyways, this guy went on this rant about survival of the fittest and if we are giving people $/resources (aka, showing him how to fish), then we are depleting our resources ourselves and thus totally screwing ourselves over because everything sucks already… (totally paraphrase of what he said..)

ok well, you know me. i am NOT just going to let him say that. i mean, i kind of agreed on some stuff and saw his point.. it is just WRONG. we are so blessed. it’s our obligation to give it back…  maybe not throwing $ at people, but we MUST help them. we are being ‘judged’ on THIS.

so, i found some stuff on the matter. please read:

• 923 million people across the world are hungry. ³
• Every day, almost 16,000 children die from hunger-related causes–one child every five seconds. ¹²
• In essence, hunger is the most extreme form of poverty, where individuals or families cannot afford to meet their most basic need for food. 1

• Hunger manifests itself in many ways other than starvation and famine. Most poor people who battle hunger deal with chronic undernourishment and vitamin or mineral deficiencies, which result in stunted growth, weakness and heightened susceptibility to illness. 1

• Countries in which a large portion of the population battles hunger daily are usually poor and often lack the social safety nets we enjoy, such as soup kitchens, food stamps, and job training programs. When a family that lives in a poor country cannot grow enough food or earn enough money to buy food, there is nowhere to turn for help. ¹

http://www.bread.org/learn/hunger-basics/hunger-facts-international.html

 

ok. that’s all for today. i’m in shock. plus i have way too much studying to do.. guh.

WARNING: rather lame post.

it’s raining.

i’m in the library.  yesterday was stupid. i think i did well on my mass comm exam, most likely not as well on my science exam.

i am REALLY excited about the Pumpkin Show!   i had to stop studying yesterday to flip my futon and remake it (blankets, sheets and all)… it felt nice once i did that.

other news: i miss Rio Grande. Tiffany is really funny.. lol.   and i rarely see Jacob anymore.   oh yeah, stupid fights are stupid, and people should just say things instead of walking away…. also– i miss not thinking the world is going to end if i make a wrong decision, and also, praying.

B-stud tonight, hope it goes well…

this is a stupid update, but oh yeah, there were these British folk sitting next to me here in the library, i really enjoyed listening to them. lol

did i mention my grandmother is going to Las Vegas in like 2 weeks, and i desperately wanna go?  oh, and i have a job at petsmart, yay for that.

love.

it’s too hard sometimes

 

before i write anything, i must announce that i think this man who is sitting near me in Beaner’s (who is kinda of a larger person) just let one out that has smelled the whole place up.. sick. i’m gaging.

moving on…

ok, so lately I have just been BLAH. WHY??  i shouldn’t be feeling like this. people love me. Jesus loves me. i have plans. i have ideas. i have dreams. I HAVE GOALS!  but guess what.. sometimes i don’t think i include God in any of this. like, i SAY i do, but do i really??  i do not know!!!  and this reality is so frustrating to me. it’s like, what in the WORLD do i do?? how do i fix this??

i need to trust God on this one.. but how can i trust Him when i feel like i barely know Him these days? it’s too hard sometimes…

AND to top it all off, it makes relationships suck. i feel like i am losing touch with everyone. i want to have so much time with people and i want people to want to hang out with me.. but why? for myself. not for God. like, i know by hanging out with people i am not NOT honoring God… however, i just feel like, i dont know. i feel i am very selfish..

i am really sorry to be letting this all out on WordPress..but i am in Beaner’s right now (like ALWAYS) and i just need to let some stuff out…haha OH! i decided i am going to make more purposful time with people. no more of this trying to ‘fit people in’ crap… i am going to make plans. plans with people. plans by myself. plans with God.  i NEED to.

i still do not have a job. i’m mad. why? i am a good person. i am a GOOD employee. srsly peeps. what’s up!!!  i hope atleast PetSmart will hire me… :/  

why do i sometimes feel like i have lost touch with God? why don’t i make more time with Him. what does that even mean?? What do i even need to do in order to have a real relationship with God? i mean, i THOUGHT i knew once. but i guess i was wrong… i am just really struggling to FEEL and KNOW God’s unconditional love for me.. the love he showed when he sent Jesus here to die for ME… and even that, sometimes, is hard for me to believe…

it’s just.. too… hard… sometimes.

update.

i feel like i have abandoned the internet. I’m sorry i have failed you..

anyways, this is just an update for whoever is reading this. basically, i have been really really REALLY busy lately. like, i just wish sometimes i had time to do the MOUND of laundry in my room. although, i guess i COULD be doing just that right now, however– i have chosen to hang out at the Beaner’s at Byrne and Glendale.. so yeah. serves me right that i have no time to do that…

reasons for being so busy:

1. I am trying to focus really hard on school

2. I am involved in a love revolution called Zakuska on Mondays

3. I lead a bible study so on tuesdays i meet with my peeps about that and then on wednesdays we have our actual study with our lovely girls

4. thursday is CRU (campus crusade), and NOW (finally) the OFFICE is back on.. so i must choose, or just suffer (i’m not bitter.. lol)

5. because of the aforementioned, i have no time for my friend Tiffany. or even other friends i desire to learn more about and hang with muchly..

6. any time i have left over, Jake gets. poor guy. i feel terrible that he is getting my ‘leftover’ time.. but i am trying harder to make more purposeful time with him..

7. on the weekends i basically just run errands or have something going on..lame.

8. oh, did i mention i have class too??

 

i feel like i’m complaining. but i really am not. i swear. i mean, last week.. yeah i was complaining about it all.. but this week i just felt way better about it. i realized i needed to change my focus and realize that this stuff isn’t for ME, it’s for God, so why stress?? He’s totally way better at stuff than i am, so i trust him.

sometimes i wish i believed things more..

Jake burnt me a Shawn McDonald CD, FINALLY!!!! and let me just tell you, i love this man’s voice. God has blessed him so much and i am SOOO GLAD because his music has really blessed my week! his words in his songs are just so inspiring and truthful to my life right now… yay for Shawn!

this past weekend was the Fall Getaway for CRU. i really didn’t wanna go. i felt that people wouldn’t talk to me (not everyone, just some) and yeah.. i just felt S U P E R lame for going. BUT, it turned out alright. i got to get to know some people i didn’t think i would, and i met some really great girls It was rather great. I can’t say it was as ‘life changing’ as people make it to be, but maybe i wasn’t at a point for change or something??? Who knows. But yeah, it DID help me feel a little better about not belonging here and such. so YAY for Jesus! did i mention i started to get a cold this past week and went to getaway and it got worse?? BUT IT’S FINE because i’m not dead and yeah. that’s ALWAYS a plus. haha     now if i could just get some good God time in, then things will be going swimmingly…

now, i am at Beaner’s (as i said before) waiting for Jake to get off. He’s cracking me up because he’s supposed to be training someone, and he really just makes me laugh when he’s being all serious and like “double shot blah blah blah.” i just think it’s great how he knows so much about coffee, honestly– i had no idea it was so particular. lol

needless to say, i’m busy. but willing. i am always willing to have MORE in my schedule. to meet MORE people. and to impact MORE lives for Christ. to hang out with someone MORE.  anything.  maybe that’s good??  well, i don’t see it changing, so i HOPE it’s good.

oh. p.s. i totally kicked butt on my sign language dialogues.. 99% babaaayyy!!!   i LOVE sign.

did i mention how excited i am that Jim and Pam are engaged on the office??? (shut up. i know i’m lame.) yeah, there may be some complications coming, i’m sure of it.. but hey. THEY’RE GREAT..so leave me alone!

keep loving, peeps!

days go by

I am just sitting here waiting for Jake to come to my house so i can apply for some jobs and get my car checked out because the check engine light is on.. :/   so i thought i would just jot a little something down…

lately i have just been thinking aboout how much EASIER it is to give it all to God. i mean, SERIOUSLY PEOPLE. it’s beyond the easiest thing.. it’s the most rewarding as well.   when we try to control things or just put God as the ‘copilot’ then that doesn’t work out too well…

i’m reading this book thats called “100 cups of water”. it’s basically a little blurb daily or something to think about each day. i haven’t been reading it as much as i wanted because.. i don’t really know. it’s been hard to quit thinking about all the negative crap lately.. and i do not know why. well, LIE. i do. It’s because the enemy still thinks he can knock me down a little further from God.. which is false. but yeah… anyways, i just think (like this little book thinks as well)… what if we were Flight attendants instead of trying to be the pilot.. or even the copilot??

just some food for thought…   other note: i miss my dog, family, friends from home, and my hair.

Land of the free, home of the brave, sick and unethical. WOO!

OK, so i am in this science class called Down To Earth. It’s completely ridiculous. i mean, i hate science, but i enjoy THIS class,, what the heck??  Anyways, the other day we were having a lecture and my prof used a few youtube videos to prove a point about Ethics and laws and such…  Basically, i am appauled and I want all of you (like 2 people) to be equally as so…

 

 

i mean, seriously???  How in the world is that even Environmentally Just??  Those people are completely forced to fight for the removal of these plants.. NOT THE HEADS OF THE CITY or anything.. these CITIZENS must fight.  How lame America?? seriously.  There are some sweet ways to help them actually at the end.. which i am going to look into.. but yeah. i just was rather shocked.

there was going to be more to this post but i am just a bit upset these past few days so i just think i am going to listen to my music…

love.

I’m in love with my major. :)

today i had my first day of my sophomore year of college. i mean, to most it’s like “who cares??” but yeah.. it’s a big to me. needless to say, i was freaking out about it because i hadn’t actually bought my books yet, and my tuition wasn’t paid for… and i just didn’t even know where my classes were or even my schedule. basically, i was screwed. however, it all turned out ok! yay for that! i basically just looked up my schedule yesterday and figured out where my classes were in my head.

i woke up at 8:00 this morning because i live farther away from school this year. (for those who DIDN’T know, i am living with my friend Tiffany and her family at their house in Maumee, OH which is basically only like 10-15 minutes away.. OK! sometimes 20.)  i feel terrible about getting up so early. first off, i didn’t get much sleep last night, BUT then!!! i get in the shower this morning and i didn’t even realize that Ori (Tiff’s sister) was up. i think maybe she needed to get in the bathroom to get ready.. but i’m not sure. nevertheless, i still feel terrible about getting up and disturbing everyone with my clanks and blowdrying of my hair this morning. if you read this, I’M SORRY CABACUM’S!!!

i leave around 8:50 to venture to campus. jake advised that i arrive extra early since it’s the first day of school and that i should see if my classes are still where they said they were on my schedule. luckily, they were!   but anyway! i get to campus and there were so many flipping cars there, i was so ticked. i FINALLY found a parking spot. my first class was mass communication and society. it was basically AMAZING!  i met a girl there and she’s pretty cool! i am just so excited to actually have people in my classes with my same major or interested in the things that i am. see, before i was in political science. when i would tell people about my interests being writing and communication and how we all interact, they just looked at me with a repulsed look and asked ‘WHY??’… so yeah, IT WAS NICE!!!  my teacher is hilarious. he has some sweet slides to go along with his lecture. i mean, Flava Flav was on it. oh and ALSO Jerry Springer. so i mean, COME ON, that just SCREAMS awesome. the class is way packed though. 110 students. when it’s only supposed to have 100… sucks for him. he read every single name today for role. actually, he got halfway through it and someone finally opened the door outside and a mass amount of people came flooding in the room…poor guy.  btw!!! he asked if anyone had a blog in there, and i was the ONLY person. what has happened to the world?? i mean seriously!! do these people not have any THOUGHTS?!?!  guess not..

after that, i sat in the lawn of Centennial Mall. and basically just fell asleep for a bit. i have like an hour and fifteen minute break between my first two classes on monday’s and wednesday’s… so today. i thought i would take advantage of the time for a much needed nap. YAY!

my second class as News Writing. i actually got there and didn’t think i was supposed to be in there because it was a class full of sweet Mac Desktops.. i mean, i guess i just never thought that news writing would involve the internet… or computer..or something..  i guess i’m an idiot.  we had to tell the whole class who we were and what we were all about. i think people think im the crazy Christian chick.. see, i told them that i wanted to in PR/journalism for missions orgs… and that i just wanted to bring light all the things that the media DOESN’T bring up such as homelessness and that it CAN be helped, or poverty in the world… just STUFF. and yea…  i don’t know. i just hope people can see that Jesus is cool.. who cares if they like me.

third class=SNOOZE FEST.   it’s philosophy. contemporary moral problems.. EW. i mean, it sounded cool… but then i got in there.. and jordan and i BOTH agreed that our teacher is one of those guys that is just SO smart that you cannot even talk to him…  it sucks, but i guess i will learn about the problems in the world??  who knows.  i just pray i don’t fail. haha

 

NOW, i am at Beaners ( a coffee place around here). it’s really not that busy.. which is nice. i mean, i basically go in my own world when i’m here anyways since i listen to my ipod and get on the internet and such..  but yeah. i love it.    i just don’t think it smart of me to drive alllllll the way back home to just have to come BACK in town for Zakuska ( a swwwweeet bible study i go to on Monday’s) you know??   and like, seriously. EVERYDAY i have something to do in the evenings that requires me to be back around campus.. so there is just NO point. i will either go to the library, hang at someone’s room or come to beaner’s. and today the choice was Beaner’s since Jake is working.    he’s so cute making his coffee and wearing his little orange Beaner’s t-shirt. lol. 

AMAZING NEWS!!!  today, once i arrived in my News Writing class after deciding i WAS supposed to be in there, haha, i got on the Mac (which i have TOTALLY decided i NEED a macbook…) and checked out my financial aid situation. i will only have to pay roughly $1,300.00 this semester.. and the same for next semester!! God is SO cool. i mean, this time a few weeks ago i had given up the thought of coming to UT again because my appeal hadn’t been approved. then i went to Zakuska, we prayed specifically for me to be able to go to UT and to be apart of whatever ministry God needs me in HERE at Toledo… and the next day, BAM! it was approved!!! (after much laying down the law at the Rocket Solution Central haha)

and yeah, that was my day in a very LARGE nutshell!   ugh. there is a girl her with her macbook.. just taughting me with it bc i don’t have one.. :/   i MUST get one.

well, i guess i am going to look at people’s pics on facebook. OH YEAH!! AHHHHH CONGRATS JOLIE! i am SO SO SO happy for you!

love. jo